Author Archive
Mixed drinks…
The Rookie provided mixed drinks for the grandchildren at their request, and then had to explain that the drinks are called Arnold Palmers (lemonade and iced tea), and then had to explain who Arnold Palmer is, and then had to explain why the drinks were named after Arnold Palmer, and then had to explain that an Arnold Palmer is more of a drink than a food, etc., etc. :-)
The Bird Feeder Episode
The Rookie bought a bird feeder and bag of birdseed and has been helping the grandchildren refill it for the moment (finally) when the grandchildren could be outside in the shadow of the back porch and watch the birds eating. Here goes:
The Rookie (whispering): Look, there are birds eating from the bird feeder.
Oldest grandchild (after looking for 1.5 seconds, not whispering): I want to go swing.
The Rookie (whispering): Wait, let’s watch them eat for a minute. If you go out there, they will fly away.
Oldest grandchild (still not whispering): If I run out there, will the birds eat me?
The Rookie (still trying to whisper and not laugh): No, they will be scared of you because you are bigger than they are, they will fly…
Oldest grandchild (left at full sprint toward swingset before sentence ended, birds flew away)
The Rookie (no longer whispering): Away…
Play clothes all over!
Tip from The Rookie: Simply changing out of your work shirt when the grandchildren come over for supper is not always enough… when you are eating outside on a metal mesh table, sometimes you find out that you needed to have been wearing different pants too :-)
Curb service…
When The Rookie hurt his knee and couldn’t get around well, the best part about getting food delivered to the study by the grandchildren is that they would stay and help eat it. :-)
The Bear & square-note singing
The Rookie sang a Sacred Harp song in the choir for the first time Sunday, which reminded him of this (true) story from long ago…
When The Rookie was a teenager, he worked in his father’s truck garage after school. An older gentleman named Mr. C also worked there. Mr. C enjoyed Sacred Harp music so much that he spent almost every weekend travelling to different rural churches that would have a special program of this music. These special programs were called “Square Note singings” after the shaped notes in the sheet music.
On a few of these weekends, Mr. C met Bear Bryant, the famous University of Alabama football coach. Bear grew up in a church that sang the Sacred Harp music, and he would attend 6 to 8 “Square Note singings” a year in the off-season. Mr. C and the Bear became good friends.
There was an upcoming “Square Note singing” over in Mississippi that both Mr. C and Bear had attended before, and Mr. C called Bear a couple of months before to see if he wanted to attend. Bear said sure, and “come on over to Tuscaloosa and we can take my car over to the church“.
When the weekend arrived, Mr. C drove to the Bear’s house to pick him up. Bear was a little late getting home and tired, so he threw Mr. C the keys to his car, and said “Squimp” (this was what the Bear called Mr. C), “You know where we are going, so you can drive.”
The Bear had a brand-new big black Mercedes coupe, and Mr. C had never driven such a nice car before. Soon they were out on the highway doing about 85 towards Mississippi.
After a couple of minutes, the Bear said “Squimp, we’re not moving very fast. Is there something wrong with this car?”
Mr. C. said “What do you mean, Paul?” (this is what Mr. C called the Bear, which was his given name). “It’s a great car and we’re going 85!”
The Bear then said, “Now Squimp, I’ve got some folks who work for me that have put the word out about this car. There is not a State Trooper in Alabama or Mississippi that will pull this car over.”
Mr. C said they made the rest of the trip doing between 100 and 120 without a bit of a problem. :-)
Can’t tell book by cover…
Tip from The Rookie: Some grandparents may outwardly appear to be younger when pictured with grandchildren, but all those years remain on the inside :-)
Icons in motion…
The Rookie‘s parents cannot launch programs on their computer if their icons are moved around on their desktop. The Rookie‘s grandchildren cannot launch programs on the tablet until their icons are moved around on their desktop. :-)
Chip off the old block…
The Rookie received confirmation that there was no mix-up at the hospital when on a long car trip with the grandchildren, the first whine from the back seat was “I don’t know the plan”. :-)
Need help ASAP…
The Rookie’s grandmother was famous for calling out loudly “Does anybody work here?” when a sales person was not available in a store. When Granny needs help in the paint department, for some reason the grandchildren ask everyone who walks by, “Are you the paint man? We have to find the paint man!”
Laughter not always best…
The Rookie laughed out loud when grandsons were racing their Cozy Coupe and three-wheeler down the sidewalk, and older grandson pushed off younger grandson into the grass when he tried to pass. Then, The Rookie laughed even louder when younger grandson recovered, bumped his brother’s car from behind, then blew on by when he got to the wide spot at the driveway and left older grandson crying because he got passed. All this laughing was not particularly helpful to the situation, but The Rookie is still not very good at controlling his amusement. :-)